My Other Kids

Eden is six weeks old today!

I can't believe how fast it's gone by.  It seems like just yesterday we were bringing her home.  But at the same time, it feels like forever.  In just six weeks I've forgotten what life before Eden was like.  I took her up to the school on Friday to meet my students, and it was so weird being back there.  It really seems like a lifetime ago that I was a teacher!  I couldn't believe that it had just been a few months since I was up there every day planning, teaching, grading.  It seems like ages ago!

My kids at school were involved in my pregnancy more than anyone else!  Maybe even more than Dustin!  They cheered when I told them I was having a baby on the first day of school back in August.  And they saw me almost every single day, watching me grow from a tiny little bump in August to a giant basketball sized belly in December.  They rubbed my belly and felt her kicks.  They were so excited when I announced it was a girl, and I brought them a cake that said "It's A Girl!" to eat at lunch.  I showed them ultrasound pictures after all my appointments, and the day after I had my anatomy scan, we ignored history and spelling for the morning and watched the DVD of her ultrasound instead.  They got to see her little body squirm and kick on the projector.  They started bringing stuffed animals and little toys for me to give to her and drawing pictures for me that said "We love Baby Hargrave!"  On the last day of school before Christmas, they threw me a surprise baby shower.  I walked into the gym expecting a Christmas party, but instead I was met by 28 kids screaming "SURPRISE!"  They stocked me up with baby wipes and books for Eden's little library.  But most importantly, they prayed.

Every single morning, Monday to Friday, they prayed for us.  In August they prayed for a healthy Mrs. Hargrave and a healthy Baby Hargrave.  After we found out it was a girl in September, they started praying that little Mini Jenni would be beautiful.  In October when I told them that her name started with an E and that it was a name that could be found in the Bible, they named her Esther and prayed for Baby Esther every morning.  My 5th graders made a giant chalk drawing for me one morning when we were outside that said, "We love the 5th grade and Baby Esther."  They begged and begged for me to tell them her real name, and I actually broke down and told them that her name was Eden before I had told most of my family even!  They prayed that she was healthy, they prayed that she was beautiful, they prayed that she would grow up a be a good Christian, they prayed that I would be a good mother and they prayed that Dustin would be a good father.  You name it, they prayed it. 

I was a nervous wreck the entire time I was pregnant.  I panicked and freaked over every little thing.  Then there were bigger things like a Fifths Disease scare and gestational diabetes and polyhydramnios.  I didn't always tell my students all the little details, but on days that I was especially worried over something, I would tell them that I was scared and that we needed extra prayers that morning.  And they would pray their little hearts out.  And as I sat there each morning listening to them pray, all my worries would completely evaporate.  Who better to pray for you than little children?  I knew that my baby was completely taken care of as I listened to those prayers.  Those mornings were so special to me.  It was my favorite part of each day to hear my baby be prayed for like that!

When people tell me that my baby is beautiful, I say, "Well of course she is!  She had a bunch of 5th graders praying that she would be for five months!"

Stacy told me that when I texted her to tell her that I had delivered Eden, they did an all-call to announce to the building that she had been born, and everybody cheered.  I talked to my 5th graders on speaker phone from my hospital bed, and for the past month and a half, I've been texting Stacy pictures of Eden to show to everyone.

And on Friday, I finally got to take Eden up to the school to meet my fellow teachers and all my kiddos in person.  I was SO EXCITED!  That's an understatement actually!  On Thursday night, I seriously sat with Eden in her closet trying outfits on her to decide what she should wear on Friday.  I was like a kid on Christmas morning driving to the school on Friday.  I couldn't wait for them to finally see who they had been praying for all those months! 

And they didn't disappoint!  They were so cute!  Oohing and ahhing over her tiny fingers and toes.  Rubbing her head and talking to her.  It was such a wonderful day.  And then Stacy asked everyone to gather around and pray for us.  All my kids circled me and Eden, and one more time I got to listen as they prayed for her health and my health and for her to grow and be a good baby.  It was so good for my soul.  I was really sad when it was time for us to leave, but it was another very special day that I will remember always. 

But I plan on taking her back up there many many times!

Also, I can't help but be excited that Eden was born on a leap year and I get an extra day for her first year! =)

Some Favorite Photos

I take so many pictures of Eden!  Seriously, there hasn't been a day since she's been born that I haven't taken her picture.  I took over 500 pictures the 3 days we were in the hospital, and I've only slowed down slightly.  Here are a few of my favorites from this past week:

This is from her first bath in her little bathtub.  Baby Girl was NOT happy, but she looks so adorable!

Love those house shoes!

She looooovvves her Daddy!

=)

Eden - One Month

I cannot believe it's been one month since Eden was born!  That is crazy to me!  And scary!  And just a reminder of how I need to savor each and every moment. 

When I cried and cried about Eden turning one week, Dustin asked me how in the world I would ever be able to handle her turning one month.  But I'm handling it pretty well actually!  No tears yet! =)

I plan to take her picture each month on her little lamb. 

Eden has yet to sleep in her crib.  She sleeps in a bassinet in our room every night.  Before she was born I had the bassinet on my side of the bed, but away from the bed up against the wall.  And I told myself that it was only for the first month and after a month, she would start sleeping in her room.  Well since she's been here, the bassinet is right up against our bed every night so that I can just reach out and hold her little hand or rub her little head in the night.  And I'm not even close to ready for her to sleep in her crib.  I'm not even sure why she has a crib actually.  Or a room.  Her room is pretty much just a place where I keep her clothes. 

It's been raining like crazy here lately.  Last night it was pouring and lightning and thundering outside, and Dustin was gone.  So Eden and I curled up in bed together at about 6:30 to watch a movie.  It'll be really fun one day when we do that together and she's actually aware of what's going on!  Today is another gray, dreary, misty, rainy day.  But I enjoy days like that every once in a while.  The three of us are all snuggled up nice and warm.  So I'm gonna get off the computer now and get back to my family! =)

Happy Valentine's Day...

...a day late!

I love Valentine's Day!  It's such a happy day!  And I don't think that it should just be about husbands and wives and girlfriends and boyfriends.  It should just be about love.  Love for everyone.  Just a happy day where you celebrate your love for friends, family and all the special people (and dogs) in your life!

I'm very traditional when it comes to Valentine's Day.  I expect red roses.  And I make no secret of it.  Dustin outdid himself this year though.  I got three dozen of those suckers!

I told Dustin he has to get me three dozen every year now though!  You can't go backwards!

Eden got herself some flowers too!  Her Godmother Kate sent her her first Valentine's bouquet.

Eden and I spent the morning baking.  We made Daddy chocolate cupcakes.

And of course, this year was happier than most because of our new little valentine.

She's the main attraction!  However, a four week old does put a damper on any romantic plans for me and Dustin.  So we celebrated Valentine's Day this year at my Granny and Pops' house with some of my family.  I wanted a picture of Eden with some of the adoring men in her life - the Marek men! (minus Uncle Marshall, plus Daddy Dustin)

I love it!  As I was snapping the picture, Eden decided to throw her little arm in the air and announce to the world that she is #1! 

As if we didn't already know!

We love because He first loved us.  1 John 4:19

I'm Just Ramblin'

Eden is three weeks and two days old, and we've managed to work ourselves into a routine during the week while Daddy is at work.  Well really it's not much of a routine.  But it works for me.  I feed her when Dustin leaves for work.  She falls right back to sleep after she eats in the mornings, and I have three hours until she wakes up and needs to eat again.  I take her downstairs and put her in her nap nanny on the kitchen counter.  And in those three hours I rush around like a mad woman trying to get everything for the day done... sweeping, cleaning, paying bills, laundry, uploading pictures of her, writing this blog post... whatever needs to be done for the day I am determined to do in those three hours.  Because after that, I am completely devoted to her for the rest of the day.  And if something doesn't get done in those three hours, so be it... I have a baby to hold!

When she's awake, I'm holding her, talking to her, playing with her...

And when she's asleep, I'm holding her.  Her afternooon naps are my favorite part of the whole day.  I lay on the couch with her asleep on my chest.  And for hours I soak it in.  The way she smells, the little noises she makes, how soft her skin is, how adorable she is when she stretches and wiggles around in her sleep.  I forget everything else in the world.  The only things that exist at 2 in the afternoon are me and her.  Because I know she won't always fit on my chest.  And I know she won't always want to lay on my chest for her afternoon naps.  And I know I will never get this time back.  That even if one day Dustin and I do have another baby, I won't have empty afternoons where I can lay on the couch for hours holding my baby.  I'll have little Eden to chase after. =)

So for now I try to take in everything that I can.

The other day I was just staring at her.  And sometimes I feel like my heart could seriously just burst because I love her so much.  Sometimes it's actually a physical pain.  And it made me realize two things.

One is just how much my mom loves me.  She even told me that the day we brought her home from the hospital.  She said, "How much you love that little girl.... That's how much I love you."  And that's amazing to me.  To have someone love you that much.  And I know Eden will never understand just how much I love her until she has a child of her own.  And then I can turn to her and say, "That's how much I love you."

And two... How much God loves me.  I think I love my daughter... but I know my little human brain and heart are just not capable of the kind of love that God can feel.  The love I feel for her is nothing compared to the love God feels for me.  Again, that's amazing to me.

What an awesome feeling.

"God is love.  He didn't need us.  But He wanted us.  And that is the most amazing thing." - Rick Warren

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."  Romans 8:38-39

My Adorable Little Football

Today was supposed to be Eden's due date.  Which is really weird to me.  For so many months, this is the day that I was aiming for, counting down to, looking forward to.  But God had other plans.  And I feel so blessed that today, on Eden's due date, I've already had almost three weeks of Baby Eden goodness!

Yesterday was Eden's first Superbowl.  Dustin is all about Superbowl.  We have a Superbowl party every year.  (Although this year I put my foot down a little bit and insisted that we have something low-key with only a few people.  Dustin obliged.)

Since I knew Eden's due date was around Superbowl, I had in it my head for months that if she was born before it, then I wanted to dress her up like a football.  I told Dustin on Saturday how bummed I was because I never managed to get the stuff to make her a football onesie.  I'm not ready to leave Eden, but I'm also not ready to take her into a germy store!  But Dustin surprised me...  He went grocery shopping on Saturday to get everything for the party, and when he came home he had all my supplies to make Eden her football!  He actually couldn't find a plain brown onesie anywhere, so he bought a white one and some brown dye.  So I dyed her onesie brown and then cut strips of elastic and glued them down. 

And she was the cutest little thing EVER!

Awwwwwwwwwwww.